Step 2: Crippling Indecision

            I think I owe you an apology. It’s been about 11 weeks since I’ve posted anything and I feel like I broke a promise. An ultimitely not-real promise that I never promised to anyone else but myself but a promise none-the-less.

When I set out to start a blog, I figured it would be a nice way to give myself a weekly writing assignment with a casual deadline that would light enough of a fire under me to get myself to become a disciplined, focused and productive writer. Well instead, as it turns out, the reality is that it has just added one more thing to my plate that I’m failing to eat and it’s making me feel like a miserable failure! Great!

           

            What’s the problem, you may ask? Well, I’ll tell you! It’s trying to make a fucking decision about what to write about! That’s the problem! And I just said “about” twice in the same sentence!  So grammar is my problem too, apparently.

            Yes, I could have posted about the election. But did we, as a society need another article about the election? Way more in depth features were written by much more politically savvy people than I. Many more heartfelt and poignant rants were posted by much angrier people than I. And every professional comedian had an undeniably more unique and hilarious take on the situation than I.

I could have written about any myriad of Thanksgiving, Christmas or general holiday thoughts. I could’ve written about auditions and the life of an actor, how excited I am about Star Wars, how much my son is lamenting that he doesn’t have a Boston accent. I have so many things to say and yet I have no idea how to decide what to spend my time writing about!

As it turns out, I checked my birth records and at an early age I was diagnosed with the mutant power of crippling indecision. From coffee to dinner to socks to t-shirts, my days are filled with “which pair of underwear should I wear today” type decisions that ultimately mean nothing but take agonizing minutes out of my free time, in a way that leaves me with nothing to show for my efforts (except, of course, hopefully actually getting that pair of underwear on). I sometimes can’t even decide which TV show to watch which ultimately leads me down the road of not having watched anything.

What I’m trying to say to you is that I am keeping my blog (I probably will take it off of my email signature though), but my posts won’t be every week, like I said at first. And they may not even mean anything at all when they do come. But I needed to say all of this, not just for me, but for anyone else out there who is inflicted with this indecisive behavior and knows what it’s like to really not know if you’re in the mood for fucking Italian or Chinese food or pudding on a regular basis. I feel like just getting this message to you is something anyway and in this new Trump Era that is now upon us, every little thing can help.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go ahead and save this post and let it sit on my desktop until I make a decision on whether or not I should even post it.  [At the time of this posting, it had been sitting on said desktop for 5 weeks.]